LOOOOVE MEEEEEE… THAT’S ALLLLLL I AAAASK OF… YOUUUUUUUUU!!!

Beautiful and so damn true. Thanks Greg… Theg.

Thanks, Jason. Thason.

Good, right? You want more?!?!?! Here!

Love it.

Love him.

If you’re on Twitter and not following Mr. Urbaniak (@JamesUrbaniak)…

YOU’RE A GOD DAMNED FOOL!.

Also… I love this video:

I-I-I wanna ba-a-ake you a ca-a-ake for you to eat in the Hunger Games!

Oh yeah… and this one ain’t so bad either…

Hellooooooooooooo, Katniss!

And yes… there is a lot of sex. A lot of sexy sex. But it isn’t Hollywood sex. It’s real sex. The kind that scares conservatives and the evil MPAA. This movie was released as unrated because the distributors knew they would get an NC-17 rating and didn’t want that. Think about that for a second. NC-17 for sex, minor drug usage (which is common in most TV shows nowadays), and cursing (in Spanish). Compare that to the R rated The Passion of the Christ where Jesus spends the entire movie being violently and graphically tortured. Blood and gore are prevalent throughout the entire film. How about any of the Saw movies? At least Passion had religion as a fucked up and disgusting excuse. The first Saw movie may have had some cinematic value, but the rest were nothing but torture porn. Realistic torture porn. How fucked up is our society that we think that truly horrifying violence is not quite as bad as sex??? Fuck that. Fuck America. Sex is beautiful. Sex is good. The human body is a work of evolutionary art. I’m not surprised that many base their faith in a god on the elegance of the human body alone.

Now then…. The Netherlands… they’ve got it right. The Passion of the Christ is rated 16 (Not recommended for children younger than 16 years) and Y tu mamá también is only rated 12 (Not recommended for children younger than 12 years). Hell yeah, Dutch people. That is a culture I can get behind! Come on, America… let’s catch up. We don’t wear belt buckles on our hats anymore.

Also. The director, Alfonso Cuarón, directed Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Rad.

Heather and I are watching Tron Legacy tonight! Yay!

Look… dumb conservatives!!!

Listen… an amazing mashup!

Also… ARCADE FIRE CONCERT TOMORROW!!! AHHHHH!!!

Wayne Coyne sleeping in bed. What could be better?

Avril Lavigne? No. She’s not better. But… she is awesome. And pretty. And I like this song:

I know… it’s good.

OH. GOD. I just realized something amazing. Tomorrow, my parents are taking Heather and me to Hello Dolly at the Hale Theater in downtown Gilbert. Why is this amazing? I’ll tell you why:

WaaaaAAAaaaAAAaaall-eeeee!

Yes… somehow I had forgotten that a couple of songs and scenes from Hello Dolly are a very important part of one of my favorite movies of all time! I’m going to force Heather to watch it with me tonight. I think it’s a safe bet that I will be doing some major crying.

I love you!

You know you love it. Michael Buckley does!

I’m still convinced there is some kind of brainwashing involved here. Just like in Up, Up, and Away (the amazing Disney Channel Original Movie)! She’s not saying Friday like that because she’s a bad singer… she’s saying Friday like that because that’s how they encode their evil mind control directions! Yeah… take that, Alex Jones!

You can also read the whole thing at Brandon Hardesty’s blog. It’s a pity that he’s not more well known. He really is a great actor.

For those of you totally lame cats who have no fucking idea who Oswald the Lucky Rabbit is (shame on you!), here’s a brief summary from the Disney Archives:

Oswald starred in a series of 26 silent cartoons made by Walt Disney between 1927 and 1928 for Charles Mintz, who contracted with Universal for the distribution. When Walt lost the rights to Oswald, he came up with the character of Mickey Mouse. The Oswald character was later continued by Walter Lantz. Sound was added by Universal, the copyright holder, to some of the Disney Oswald cartoons in the early days of television. Oswald was the first Disney character to generate merchandise: a candy bar, a stencil set, and a pinback button. In 2006, The Walt Disney Company regained the rights to Oswald, in a trade with NBC/Universal.

And for a more detailed (and possibly incorrect (Wikipedia FTW) ) history, you should definitely check out the Oswald the Lucky Rabbit Wikipedia article.

Also… here’s one of his cartoons!

In conclusion, this is going to be the best tattoo ever.

P.S. Can I also just say that I have wanted this tattoo for over a year and I did not just jump on the Oswald bandwagon when Epic Mickey came out. Epic Mickey is awesome and I really need to finish it, but my love for Oswald is legit.

And just for good measure… INCEPTION CAT:

I can has Joseph Gordon-Levitt?

You know what else the internet was made for? DJ Earworm!

I cannot wait until the United States of Pop 2010 comes out!!!

Now I know that all of the “basic reading level” simpletons that my blog is geared towards won’t understand, but that video right there is metaphor city. Think about it…

Just. Think. About. It. So intense…

She’s so hot.

Also! This:

Julian Assange Fired From IT Job At Pentagon

ARLINGTON, VA—With officials describing his publication of sensitive U.S. State Department documents as “the last straw,” Wikileaks founder Julian Assange was asked to resign from his position as the Pentagon’s IT coordinator Monday. “We gave him his first warning after the whole Iraq and Afghanistan war diaries thing, and strike two was when he forwarded that video montage of Nicolas Cage yelling to the entire staff,” Defense Department human resources director Curtis Shannon said. “But we just can’t overlook this latest offense. Even if he’s the only one who knows where the spare USB cables are.” At press time, Assange had already been invited to interview for an IT position at the Central Intelligence Agency.

Pure. Hilarious. Genius.

UPDATE! Just had to add this absurd video from the ONN:

I hope you RIP when you finally die, Paul.

Also… the guy playing Wile reminds me of Wayne Coyne. Radical.

And just in case it gets taken down due to its absurd sillyness… here’s an animated GIF:

Christine… you are really dumb… fo’ real.

Also… this is the best use of auto-tune ever.

Also… I love you.

Update!!! Oh snap! Look at these two tweets that Mr. Nathan Fillion just tweeted:

“First, watch http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQSNhk5ICTI”
@NathanFillion

…and then…

“Then this http://tinyurl.com/26fr6pb”
@NathanFillion

Yeah. We’re on the same level. Nathan… I love you.

“Like millions of other Americans, I have always had a good impression of Paul McCartney and thought of him as a classy guy, but I was surprised and disappointed by the lack of grace and respect he displayed at the White House,” Boehner said in a statement. “I hope he’ll apologize to the American people for his conduct which demeaned him, the White House and President Obama.”

You suck.

Okay… here’s the video. Seinfeld’s look after he says it is pretty awesome:

Oh man… check out some of the stupid comments left on YouTube by some conservatives:

EmmaLG3 writes: @ArchEnemyToTheState Aren’t you tired of having to wipe that stinky brown stain off your nose… ALL THE TIME? Paul NEVER went to college… and i’d be surprised to hear he even finished grade school…. so I guess YOUR mental ability must be below 50! And we ALL know… idiots laugh at EVERYTHING! The Teleprompter Reader…. you know Barry Hussein O’DimWit… won’t let ANYONE see ANY of his school papers! Sooooo…. WHY would you hide your past, unless YOU have something to HIDE!

kennethy56 writes: Sorry about that Mr. Mills, you have been one of my favorite performers. I have almost every album and CD that you and the Beatles have ever sold. It will be a long time before I “ever” listen to you or them again. You are a moron and like 0bamba are mean, a racist and ignorant. President Bush probably read more books in year than 0bamba has read in his entire life. Appoligize now and if “you” can read try reading about his lying, radical ties and how he has screwed up the USA and the world.

obiewankablowme writes: Wow! This is FANTASTIC! I thought McCartney DIED years ago (and I don’t mean during the PAUL IS DEAD era). I guess it was just his class and career that died. I’m glad to see that the doddering old DUMBSHIT is still alive. In addition PAUL’S not looking too well (very bad hair dye job), I guess RINGO is now the cutest BEATLE! FUCK OFF BACK TO ENGLAND YOU DUMB CUNT!

Tell it, Mr. West!

“The folks who conducted to act on our country on September 11th made a big mistake. They underestimated America. They underestimated our resolve, our determination, our love for freedom. They misunderestimated the fact that we love a neighbor in need. They misunderestimated the compassion of our country. I think they misunderestimated the will and determination of the Commander-in-Chief, too.” – George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Sept. 26, 2001

I feel like I am running out of juice on this blog. I need some inspiration. It will come.

Also, I posted this video of the malfunctioning bathroom light in my office from my iPhone, and it now has almost 700 views. What the fuck?