‎”Birthers aren’t satisfied because no matter how many documents Barack Obama releases it will never be enough, because there isn’t a document in the world that will turn him white.” – Barbara Morrill

Hey, birthers… SIT. AND. SPIN.

In other news…

I have officially started our “Let’s Get Some Disneyland Premium Annual Passes for Heather and Adam” savings fund. On the 25th of every month, I will be withdrawing one hundred and sixty dollars cash from our bank account and depositing it into a secret, Disneyland-themed money holding vessel in my office at home (please don’t steal it). By December, we will have more than enough for both of us to get passes! The excess money will probably be used to buy food (Blue Bayou!) and souvenirs (pins!). There really is a great big beautiful tomorrow!

In other news…

I deleted both my Yelp and Linkedin accounts yesterday! I deleted Linkedin because I don’t have any desire whatsoever to make business connections or be involved in the business world. Linkedin is for grown ups, and I ain’t a grown up! I deleted Yelp because I am trying to severe as many ties to the internet as possible. This blog, Facebook, Twitter, and some of the photo sharing sites are about all I want. I love me some internets, but real life is much more fun. I’d rather ride Splash Mountain IRL than watch a ride through video… like this one!

I miss Disneyland.

First off… tomorrow is Yelp’s Ultimate Science Fair at the Arizona Science Center! Heather, my mom, my dad, and my uncle are all going. This is the biggest Yelp event of the year, and it looks like it is going to be mind blowing.

Next up is the Girl Talk concert in a few weeks. I only recently discovered him, but I really love his mashups and have read nothing but amazing things about his live performances.

In April, Heather and I will be seeing the Grammy Award-winning Arcade Fire. FUCK YEAH! I was lucky in getting our amazing tickets as the band tweeted a special presale announcement one day early. This is why I love Twitter.

In May, the East Valley Team Willis Battalion will depart on a grand Las Vegas adventure! As we are the classiest of families, we will be staying at the luxurious Hooters Hotel and Casino.

While there, we will be seeing the cast of Glee live in concert!

A mere week after getting back from Vegas, Heather and I will be getting on a plane and going to the Netherlands! We’re going for the wedding of one of Heather’s relatives, and I could not be more excited!

And then… a week after we get back from Holland, the East Valley Team Willis Battalion will be seeing Les Misérables at Gammage. This’ll be my first time seeing it live, and I am really looking forward to it.

I’m sure there will be more fun adventures between Les Mis and December, but the next planned adventure is a Team Willis Disneyland Christmastime Spectacular!

So yeah… I guess life ain’t so bad.

And the wedding! Oh boy! We’ve been doing so much to get ready for it… I just want it to get here so I can relax and enjoy the company of my new wife and tons of friends and family. Wow… still can’t get over how different it feels this time. When I got married before, I did it because I thought I had to… Now, I am getting married because I want to. Hell yeah.

In other news, I’ve started reading my wonderfully immoral ESV study bible again. I last left off right after poor Samson got his hair chopped off and am starting back up at Matthew. Wait… what? Yeah… I’m ditching the rest of the Old Testament. It was boring, and most “Christians” today don’t even pay attention to it (except for the hating on gays part). Anyway… I will probably come back to it eventually, but for now… it’s time for Jesus!

Ya know… I do that a lot. Quit things and then start up again and then quit and then start up again. Over and over. It’s cyclical. For example, I read every single book that Mark Twain wrote in about 6 months. I couldn’t put em down! But after that… nothing. No books of any kind for about a year. Then I started reading Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. for another 6 months. Delicious, literary goodness. Then… nothing. Bah. So it goes. Yeah… same thing is happening with Yelp. I wrote a bunch of reviews and then just kind of stopped. I love writing reviews… I just can’t find the motivation as of late. I have found that if I just wait it out, my drive will eventually come back. Yeah.

Hmm… just got the sudden urge to start playing World of Warcraft again. I really did a good job of not getting addicted last time, and quitting was super easy. Maybe after the wedding. Maybe…

Ah yes… Yelp. I’ve gotten into writing reviews on Yelp. I’m loving it! You can check out my profile and reviews here. I just went to the amazing Yelp in Bloom event at the Desert Botanical Gardens with Heather. Oh god it was awesome. Click here for my (and over 100 others) review of it.

Every now and then I get this intense desire to work with my hands. I love doing this internet stuff, but sometimes I just want to put in some hard work. I kind of did this when I worked overnights as a stocker at Walmart. I loved it! I mean… I loved the job… not the people. Yikes! What a bunch of sad, pathetic human beings. Anyway… yeah. I know it’s probably a cliché, but I just felt more emotionally rewarded after a hard days work than when I have worked all day in a cubicle, staring at a computer screen. Yes, I probably am a lazy, fat-ass American at heart and would get sick of it eventually, but you never know…

I’m sure it annoys the crap out of Heather when I drag her into the toys section so I can buy an action figure or some legos, but it really makes me happy. It helps me remember to never ever grow up. Never to become boring. Never forget how amazing the world is and how much there is to learn. Grown ups think they know everything and, therefor, are boring. When you live you life knowing that there is a whole bunch of new and exciting things to learn and experience every single day, life is fucking awesome!

Seriously, the next time you are at Target or Walmart, go to the toys section and buy a toy. It’ll really bring you back. It’s fun!

Whoa… can you say… tangent? Anyway. Here we goooooooooooooo…

Favorite Artist or Band: The Beatles. I know it sounds boring and lame, but I mean it. I mean it so much. I love The Beatles. There is no getting around how great they are. I still can’t believe I got to see Paul live. I cried so much. That was the closest I will ever get to a religious experience.

Favorite Album: The Soft Bulletin by The Flaming Lips. True, my favorite album is not by my favorite band, but The Soft Bulletin really is the best album of all time. It’s the kind of album that you listen to all the way through and feel this amazing sense of satisfaction. It’s sexy, chaotic, beautiful, depressing, uplifting, psychedelic, and perfect in every way. And if you have surround sound, be sure to buy the 5.1 surround sound Soft Bulletin DVD. It will change your life!

Favorite Songs: Tie! I’m Yours by Jason Mraz and Gemini (Birthday Song) by Why? These two songs are tied because they are both amazing. I’m Yours is just a really great, feel good song. Who doesn’t love it? I would say that it is objectively a perfect song. Perfect… just like Gemini (Birthday Song). This song is beautiful. It is emotional and intense. The lyrics blow me away every time I listen to it… and I listen to it a lot! I am 100% positive that I have listened to this song more than any other song ever. The band Why? is amazing, and this is their best song by far.

Favorite Rum: Sailor Jerry. Yum.

Favorite iPhone App: Yelp. So useful. I have started writing Yelp reviews recently, and have really started to appreciate the Yelp community and all that it is doing. Sure, some of them are snobs, but overall they are providing the world with lots of great reviews. Awesome.

Favorite Soda: Coke Zero. I know that diet soda is not good for you. I don’t care. I have chosen to have diet soda as my one unwavering vice. It’s so yummy. Diet Mountain Dew does come in at a close second. Double yum!

That’s all. Remember… I love you.

Also, I’ve started writing reviews on Yelp. I love it! Maybe I’ll even become an elite Yelper! One can only dream…

Also, I really hope the Apple conference that is coming up contains an iPhone OS update. I love my iPhone so much, but when I compare it to Heather’s Droid… it’s just not that great.