Dakota Fanning Time! New Moon Review FTW!

Booze so far: 1 Sam Adams Octoberfest. 1 Landshark Lager. 1 Sam Adams Winter Lager. 1 double shot Captain Morgan and Pepsi.

Ooooooh yeah. This shit is getting good. New Moon!!!

You know what this mean… ABS. So much abs.

OMG SEXY YESSSS.

The plot of New Moon? Weak. Duh. Edward and Bella’s relationship is so destructive and unhealthy. Holy crap. It’s very appropriate that Romeo and Juliet was mentioned in the movie (not sure if it was this one or the last… a bit drunk). R & J were dumb and knew each other for like a day and killed themselves cuz they were stupid. Same with Edward and Bella. Look. Bella. Jacob is way better. He does not sparkle. He is warm. He has REAL abs. He doesn’t watch you sleep like a god damn pedophile maniac. He loves you! Edward is obsessed with you. You need this man out of your life. Jacob will take care of you in a healthy and loving way. You suck, Bella. And stop shaking your head so much.

I ordered pizza. Because I am drunk. Pizza plus more booze plus Eclipse equals something. I don’t know what that something is, but I’m sure it is going to rock!!!

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